The prerequisites for changing (part 2)

Post written by Orsolya Hernold


Changing oneself – a personality aspect, a habit, an old way of thinking or anything else – can be a great endeavor. Having said that I see the concept of change to develop in my head to be a heavy burden, a weight that can barely be lifted or an endless road ahead. If I look at change this way, I’d rather not change but stick to my cozy, well-known self and live happily ever after. If the same thing happens to you, then please forget my first sentence, and try to answer these questions instead:

My definition stemming from experience would be: my change is made up of rather small, persistent steps that I repeat obstinately over and over for long periods of time.


After exploring the concept of changing oneself, I would like to focus now on the preparation we can make before we set out on a change project. Setting the right environment, the prerequisites for changing, not only tunes us in the mood for change but also preconditions our mind for our goal in question.

As with learning in the previous post, we can do much to prepare for change beforehand. For instance, at a coaching session my goal is to get the coachee well – because if she / he is not well, then the change we are prepared to make will not happen. Being well is a prerequisite for a positive change to happen and as a coach my job is to support my client to finding that place of “being well”. Being well does not mean that everything around is sunshine and happy – rather there is an objective analysis of the situation present with its advantages and its hardships. This is then a place from where change can emerge.


Change is immensely eased with support from somebody. If you have a friend to whom you are accountable to, then you have set your feet on that road already. This person (can be your partner, your sibling, your teacher, your parent, anybody you choose, of course) can encourage, motivate, be a reminder or just a shoulder to lean on at harder times.


Role models can also provide the needed drive to start the change project. My role models with this blog are the teachers who devoted time to my development – their selfless support and care for me are serious building blocks of my self-confidence.


Do not feel that you are alone when you would like to change. There is an infinite resource you can tap, pay a little extra attention for the preparation phase and it will pay off in the long run. And be open to being on the other side: is there anyone you can support in a changing effort? Can you be a role model for someone?


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