Living without (part 4)

Post written by Orsolya Hernold

When we start looking for a new home, we make a list of the essentials. For years, this list included a large bathtub. My attachment to a bathtub (preferably large enough for two people) even resulted in getting disapproving reactions from a friend, who thought I was more environmentally conscious than wasting so much water daily. Well, it turns out I am not (yet).

Now, this sacred cow is slaughtered. The new flat has a tiny bathtub. My first reaction after seeing the flat was that it is out of the question to move here. Because of the tub. The size of it. I could not imagine living without the relaxing moments immersing in hot water that I enjoy every evening.

From all other aspects this flat is great, the decision was not a hard one to make. But, hey, how about this item of my essentials? My joy and love and yes, my habit of taking a bath? I would like to feel content with our decision, so I explored this sacred cow of 37 years.

First, I looked at facts.

#1. I have to admit that it is quite rare that Zoli and I can enjoy taking a bath together, I would say it occurs once a month.

#2 We spend our summer holidays at the same house for the fourth year now, where there is only a shower. The way I feel in those two weeks spent there is not affected by the way I wash in the evening.

#3 I also longed for having a tub with hydro massage function (now I have it), but I only used it about 3-5 times in two years.

My comfort-loving side still argues: I am used to having a bathtub, that’s it. It is my habit to take a bath daily. I love it, and why do I need to give this up? The family is better off with having a relaxed mom, I have my moments of solitude every day, my muscles can rest and on and on.

All true. Paradoxically, letting myself perform this self-talk, I became willing to let it go. I am not a sum of my habits and habits can be changed (I just bragged about my flexible mindset in the previous post). The stem of my attachment is being used to it rather than deciding in favor of it. And I am not fond of keeping habits just because I routinely have done so. Alright, I am open for the new life with a tiny bathtub.

Do you have sacred cows in your life? Are you prepared to observe your attachment to them you have developed over the years?


I have my escape route, though. The bathtub is tiny, but I believe I can still sit in it. I will let you know how comfortable it is.


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